But Alex’s professor doesn’t like it. She underlines the very first two sentences, and she writes, “This is simply too general. Get to the true point.” She underlines the third and fourth sentences, and she writes, “You’re just restating the question I inquired. What’s your point?” She underlines the final sentence, after which writes when you look at the margin, “What’s your thesis?” because the past sentence in the paragraph only lists topics. It does not make a quarrel.
Is Alex’s professor just a grouch? Well, no—she is wanting to show this student that college writing isn’t about following a formula (the model that is five-paragraph, it is about making a disagreement. Her first sentence is general, the way she learned a essay that is five-paragraph start. But through the professor’s perspective, it’s far too general—so general, in fact, she didn’t ask students to define civil war that it’s completely outside of the assignment. The 3rd and fourth sentences say, in a lot of words, “I am comparing and contrasting the reasons why the North and also the South fought the Civil War”—as the professor says, they just restate the prompt, without giving an individual hint about where this student’s paper is certainly going. The final sentence, which should make a quarrel, only lists topics; it does not commence to explore how or why something happened.
If you’ve seen lots of five-paragraph essays, it is possible to guess what Alex will write next. Her body that is first paragraph begin, “We can easily see some of the different reasoned explanations why the North and South fought the Civil War by looking at the economy.” Exactly what will the professor say about this? She may ask, “What differences can we see? What area of the economy are you speaking about? How come the differences exist? Exactly why are they important?” The student might write a conclusion that says much the same thing as her introduction, in slightly different words after three such body paragraphs. Alex’s professor might respond, “You’ve already said this!”
What could Alex do differently? Let’s start over. This time around, Alex does not start with a preconceived notion of how to organize her essay. In the place of three “points,” she decides that she will brainstorm until she comes up with a main argument, or thesis, that answers the question “Why did the North and South fight the Civil War?” Then she’s going to regulate how to prepare her draft by taking into consideration the argument’s parts and exactly how they can fit together. 继续阅读